So I’m writing a fic (which I will probably never publish) and I’m finding my original idea, which I wrote out at about 4 am, somewhat hilarious. This is what my brain does without any permission from me.

so what if cas used his grace to bind dean’s broken soul back together? sort of a big deal perhaps what made them have a “profound bond” but cas thought that he would be an angel forever so deans soul would always be safe. but then he falls in the end. what if the reason dean is so fucked up and uncaring is because cas’s fragile grace can barely keep his soul together? i think that future!cas still has a iddle bit of grace left (it looks like he “reads” past!deans soul) so dean’s soulful enough to not be a demon but he’s a pretty cold human.

WHATEVER WHATEVER AND THEN SOME MORE ANGST.

like lucifer’s grace reacts to cas’s and strengthens it so dean’s the most human hes been in years while facing sam and that’s part of why he can’t kill sam why do i even think of these things this show hurts my heart fuck.

ugh or lucifer intentionally strengthens cas’s grace (to fix dean, to make it so cas lives long enough to know dean failed) because he is a bastard.

Also, in case you were wondering, this is what I titled it:

My sister is my beta. I sent her part one (of three) and she said it was very existential. I inflict a lot of my random fandom feelings on my sister. I should just publish some of out text/im conversations because they are quality.

Let’s not even talk about the nine other fic ideas that I’ve got already written out.

WHY BRAIN WHY.